Almost two weeks into Long Term Maintenance (LTM), we are still adjusting to being able to go out into the world and do the things that until seven months ago we had taken for granted. You all know - those everyday errands and outings that give the rhythm to your week. For example, going to the supermarket is something we were not really able to do with Rohan. That meant that if I didn't have what I needed/wanted to make dinner, I would have to come up with something else to eat. It was frustrating to say the least, but for the last 12 days we've been faced with a new kind of frustration.
Rohan is experiencing a side-effect not from any medication but from having been confined for so long. Two days last week the first thing he said to me in the morning was, "Let's just not go anywhere today. Let's stay home all day". The rhythm of his day involves waking up and eating cereal while watching t.v., playing Wii Sports or Super Mario with me, bathing, dressing, eating lunch, napping, snacking, puzzles, board games, a visit from Ba & Dada, helping make dinner, And he doesn't want to dance to a different song. As a result, there have been many tantrums in the last week - "I don't want to go to get coffee"; "I can't keep leaving the house everyday"; "I just don't want to go to Trader Joe's". These are battles I fight in order to transition back to life as he knew it.
To make the family dynamics even more difficult, Rohan has separation anxiety. He doesn't want me and/or Ravi to go out, and when we do, he throws a tantrum that involves screaming, crying, rolling around on the floor and yelling "I don't waaaant you to go aaanywheeerre". This can and has gone on for up to 30 minutes! Again, we try not to give in with the hope that the more he is away from us, the easier it will become.
My poor bugger. The hospital staff has been so informative about side effects from the medications, but they have been completely remiss on the soft stuff. I'm not even blaming them. I understand that each child must process and react to the trauma in different ways, but a guide book would be nice. The real side effects are the emotional scars that this disease has left. Until they heal for Rohan, we are doing the best we can.
The Prologue
Since Rohan cannot explain what is happening to him, I have decided to start this blog as way to translate to all of you how he is feeling and doing throughout his treatment for leukemia. I also want it to be a kind of record for Rohan when he is older and able to read. With that said, there may at times be postings that might not make sense to you but will make sense to him later.I hope this blog helps all of you who care about Rohan and us better understand the journey. I already know it will help me to have more clarity while I make this journey with him.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
2 comments:
Where's Rohan's birthday post?! Exciting that our little man turned 5. Happy Birthday Rohan!!!
Masi
Hello all the Motwanis,
Esti and I are so much into our travels that we never take the time to talk with you or to send you a support on these difficult times.
We know you well enough to know that you are handling the situation very well and I am sure you are discovering every month how important it is to adapt our own character and feelings depending on the moments you are living. Family relations are the strongests and I am sure you will see yours strenghening along the months.
We send you love from Madrid! And look forward to spend some time with you
Post a Comment